Trials and Tribulations of a New Mother...

Alright... as a new mother I am definitely learning a lot things these days. Like babies just need to cry sometimes (as do new moms)... diapers go on with the velcro in the back and the pretty pattern in the front... and there really are such things as a "feed me now" cry and a "tired" cry.

Those of you who don't have children may read what I'm about to tell you and think "What a loser! How did she not see that coming?". To you I say, "Just wait until you have children and have to function on only a few hours of sleep a night... then you'll see how fast your logical thinking flies out the window". Those of you who do have children may read what I'm about to tell you and think "Oh yeah... been there - done that! Poor Erin!". To you I say, "Thanks for laughing with me and not at me. Glad to hear I'm not alone". And those of you who do have children may read what I'm about to tell you and think "I have kids and I don't get a lot of sleep and that's never happened to me... how did she not see that coming?". To you I say, "Well aren't you a perfect parent - if only I could be more like you!". :)

Last night at the ripe old hour of 1am or so, I was feeding Maja a midnight snack when I heard the famous "squirt" from her "nether-regions". Having learned from previous late night changings (aka getting poohed on along with the wall behind me when I opened the diaper too early before Maja was finished her business), I patiently waited for the storm to pass. After a couple of minutes had passed, I thought to myself I should just quickly check to see that was a pooh instead of a fart (because I had just changed her and didn't want to wake her up by changing her again unnecessarily). So I pulled open the back of her diaper (she was just in her diaper at this point) to sneak a peek when I heard another squirt. I remember the whole thing like it happened in slow motion... thank God I have reflexes like a cat because I was able to slam the diaper shut and move my head to the side only to narrowly escape being poohed in the eye (which, I think could have caused some blindness by the way...)! However, my hand and Maja's back were not as lucky. Poor Marvin was summoned from his slumber to the nursery to help me stand up from the chair without dripping anywhere. I think my first words in response to his startled look when he arrived were "I think I've been poohed in the face!". Boy did he ever look confused - he was probably thinking, "Poohed in the face? How in the world does someone get poohed in the face? Have I married an idiot? Oh my gosh, the mother of my child is an idiot!". Anyhow, the moral of this story (and another valuable lesson learned by me) is don't peek into a diaper unless your willing to see what's in there up close and personal... literally! :)

Anyhow, Maja and I didn't really do too much yesterday (I spent the day napping while she napped seeing as she didn't go to bed the night before from 11pm to 5:30am - so much for the shout-out to her for a great night from the day before). But we did have time to sneak in an hour of TV last night to catch the premiere of the new Survivor season (I swear I love that show). Anyhow, here is a picture of Maja settling in just before Survivor started.